Feeling the Pressure

I've had a tab open to the draft of this blog post for almost 3 days. I took these photos a while ago, which is maybe why I don't have much to say about them.  I don't know why this post has been so difficult to write.

But I did something I doubt you'd ever hear a blogger say - I (temporarily) disabled my Instagram account. I can't say exactly why I did it but it feels good. It was causes me more stress than good because I'd need to post everyday. I'd obsessively check my follower count. And I got discouraged that I was growing at the rate of other bloggers who started around the same time as me. So, I got rid of it. For now. I might bring it back but I don't know. I want this blog to feel fun again, which it hasn't for a while. I've been so focused on growing it for it to become my "career" and I've come to the realization that I don't know if I want that. At least, not right now. 

I think I'm feeling the pressure a little bit in other aspects of my life so I want to take this back to being a hobby I enjoy. It's not that I've stopped enjoying creating content. It's quite the opposite. I stopped enjoying trying to build my "brand" or whatever. I stopped enjoying self promoting my work. I started this blog as a photographic outlet for me, which I think (for now) is how I want it to stay. 

Dress: Thrifted 
Hat: Handmade
Tights: Urban Outfitters
Socks: Target
Shoes: Nordstrom 

Do you ever feel pressured by blogging? 
Let me know in the comments! 



Feeling Like a Fake

This post is a bit late... but alas. I'm sitting in the airport so I thought I should at least try and get this post up before things get too crazy for me. 

Sometimes I feel like a fake on this blog. I wish I had the time to go out and shoot the outfit I wore that day but it just doesn't happen like that for me. When you shoot all your own photos you have to plan when (and where!) you're going to take them. It's hard. So, sometimes I just think about an outfit I'd love to wear but haven't for some reason and shoot that. Unlike my blog might suggest, I don't wear makeup everyday. I don't normally wear dresses in the woods. It sure does feel nice to get dressed up sometimes. 

But this outfit is not a pre-planned outfit. Last weekend I spent a considerable amount of time in a coffee shop working away on ~the future~ and I needed something comfortable. This outfit has pretty much become my fall uniform. It's simple, comfortable and something I feel good in. I go through phases with jeans and pants and right now, I am loving them. 

 I want to show my most  authentic self here but sometimes it doesn't feel "blogger worthy" or interesting, which I suppose is why I couldn't post an outfit post everyday. If this were my full-time job I definitely could but it's not. And sometimes I wear the same dress once a week haha. 

I've also been running a lot more as of late (which I've mentioned) so I've been putting in a lot less effort with what I look like because I know I'm just going to change and get super sweaty. It's especially hard to want to put on makeup or nice clothes on the weekend because I'm just wearing running clothes or something simple like the outfit here. It's also strange because some of my friends only know me as a runner so they only see me in those types of clothes. Or some friends only know me at work so they only see me in my work clothes. It's good to have a lot of different sides to your personality but it's also weird because I feel like I'm (unintentionally) hiding part of who I am. 

Do you ever feel like a fake? 

Let me know what you think in the comments! 



a Walk in the Woods

I've had these photos sitting on my hard drive for about two weeks now. After the election I didn't want to use these photos for my return BUT I really like these photos. My dear friend Lauren from The Chic-Ethique took them after we got coffee one afternoon. Whenever I get together with Lauren and Brynna it feels really natural. I feel like we've been friends for a lot longer than a few months. 

We grabbed coffee at one of my favorite coffee shops in town and then headed to a park just down the road. I discovered this park on my hiking meetup (see the post: Here). It's pretty secluded, quiet, and has tons of trails to explore! I love that it's in the middle of the city too. Such a cool concept. I thought the entrance was really far away but turns out there are entrances all over! 

In all honesty, I'm having a really hard time balancing everything in my life right now. I work full time, run this blog, started training for a marathon AND am applying to grad schools! I took a day off for myself on Sunday, which was really nice considering my thanksgiving is going to be a bit crazy in terms of travel. I thought I had a really good system for blogging and working full-time but now I've added so many other things into the mix.... and now I have a social life?? It's hard, y'all. I just wish I had more time to work on this space. 

 How do you handle it all? 



From Fine Art to Fashion Photography

I've mentioned a few times that in 2015 I graduated with a degree in photography. Well, technically it was "Studio Art" so I took a lot of different art classes from drawing to printmaking but the majority of my work was in photography.

My friend Alice suggested I write about going from fine art photography to now - fashion photography, which is such a difference.

I'm very proud of the work I made in college - at least my senior year. When I started taking photography my sophomore year I started experimenting with self-portraits. It became a really important way for me to figure myself out while also being creative. At first, I made self-portraits just about my general life. I then moved onto some very experimental color work while I was living and producing work in Greece.

But the work I'm most proud of is the series of images from my Senior Thesis. I thought I'd share a few of them as well as my artist statement. 

My artist statement: 

In this series of autobiographical self-portraits I attempted to explore visually what “self” means as an identical twin. Experiencing every developmental stage of life with another person who is experiencing the exact developmental stage at the same time makes the idea of self more convoluted.  For much of my life, I felt as though many people grouped my twin sister and me together. Growing up, it was strange to look into a mirror and see myself peering back. It was automatically assumed that I was the exact replica of my twin sister, Laura, and that she was mine. When we were separated physically for college, it took me a long time to figure out who I was as an individual without her there. I realize, in some ways, our sense of self can never be considered without the other.

I use mirrors, reflections, and shadows as a metaphor for the feelings I have experienced of not always knowing my own identity and also having to take into account someone else when I do think about my own identity. I set up these images but I also use found reflections, shadows, and mirrors. I am inspired by my surroundings. But for this series in particular, my twin sister, who is the one person who can truly understand the feeling of not always knowing who you are without it being based on someone else, also inspires me.

When I graduated from University back in 2015 I needed to find some way to continue taking photographs. I also wanted a way to take photographs that had less meaning. I wanted photography to be fun again. So, I started this blog. It has definitely been a hard transition from the photography I used to do but I do really enjoy it.

This was a bit of a long post but I hope you enjoyed it! I want to start incorporating more of my interests and my life in this blog and this seemed like a good start. 



Finally Autumn Has Arrived

I woke up really early on Sunday morning to take these photos. I was so excited because the light was perfect and then... I realized my camera remote was out of battery! I wish I could have just zoomed back to my apartment and grabbed some batteries but I biked to this park, which is kind of far from my place. So I made due with what I had! 

 I tried my best to get some shots but when you're used to shooting self-portraits with a remote it's hard to go back. So, I apologize these aren't my best. It happens. But I do really like my outfit. 

I'm also feeling much better than I did last week. It's finally getting colder, the leaves are changing, and I'm running faster and better than ever before. I'm even thinking of signing up for a marathon in March! I've done a half marathon before so why not try the whole thing? I forgot how good I feel in the fall and winter. It's a good feeling. I'm still stressing about grad schools and whatnot but I'm going to focus on the positive things. At least I'm going to try. 

I don't have too much to say today so I'll keep this one short. 

Dress: Kohl's (old) 
Tights: Urban outfitters 
Hat: Handmade 
Shoes: Payless 

How is your week going so far? 


Where have I been?

I took the longest break from blogging this past week since I started over a year ago. I didn't intend to take a break. But it's been a hard week as I'm sure a lot of you can relate to. It didn't seem right to write about fashion when all I could think about was fear and dread (if you are concerned like me feel free to shoot me an email!). I didn't wear any makeup. I put the least amount of effort into my outfits this week as I possibly could. It's been way too hard for me to go back to business as usual on here. 

I've been doing other things besides blogging because whenever I sat down to write I felt frozen. I tried to write but I couldn't. So, I went ice skating. I ran a lot. I talked to friends. I started studying for the GRE. I attended a vigil on solidarity. I went to a fiddle concert. This past week, I didn't take a single photograph. I didn't think about numbers. I thought about my blog but it felt like a fleeting moment. It was weird. I don't know what this means in terms of my blog. I guess I just needed some space from the internet. 

This week I've been living. 

Last weekend, I had one of the best weekends in a very long time. I went to coffee with my new friends Lauren and Brynna. It was great. The next day I joined a new running club that was so welcoming and nice. I drank a lot of beer and it was the most fun I've had in a really long time. It felt really, really good. I started to feel like maybe I could stay where I am for longer. But then Tuesday night happened and I felt lost. 

This weekend I've been putting all of my energy into figuring out what grad schools to apply for and what I need to do to make that happen. But I'm back to my *almost* regular schedule (except this post on a Sunday...). So, I'll be back on Wednesday with a new post. 

This was a bit of a random post but I thought I owed you an explanation of where I've been. Thank you for sticking with me. I love all of you. 



Velvet Lookbook

Ah, velvet... this season's hottest textile... and always a favorite of mine. I noticed I have a lot of velvet in my closet and I might have made a sneaky online order for some velvet shoes....

 So, I thought I'd show you a few different ways you can rock velvet this season! Which one is your favorite?

Let me know in the comments!



Can't Go Wrong With a Classic

I'm normally more into quirkier pieces in my wardrobe but sometimes it's nice to wear something simple, something classic. I think, as fun as some pieces are, it's really important to have some basics in your wardrobe you can always fall back on, which is where these pieces come in! They're kind of like the backbone of my wardrobe - always reliable and go with almost everything I own. On a day where you are just working in a coffee shop (like I was) nothing beats some skinny jeans, ballet plats and a striped top! 

I've been branching out from the typical skinny jean lately but you know what? They're comfortable and such a basic in my wardrobe that I've been reaching for them again. But it can be really hard for someone my height to find ones that fit! These are originally from the Loft and are a "cropped fit" but they fit me perfectly. So, if you're a shorter girl like me I'd definitely recommend picking up some cropped jeans as you won't have to get them hemmed or roll them up a bunch. 

I thrifted this shirt a year or so ago and It's been a favorite of mine since fall has come around (I mean... kind of. It's still 80 degrees!). When I wear skinny jeans I try and wear something a little bit looser and boxier on top so this shirt is perfect for that! 

You've probably seen my bag before but it is such a classic pop of color that I couldn't help it with this outfit! Plus, I think red accessories are becoming a huge trend this fall. One of my all time favorite bloggers In The Frow talked about that: Here 

My necklace is a bit of a statement but it's become such a staple in my wardrobe. It's hard to not wear it with everything!

Shirt: thrifted 
Jeans: Thrifted 
Shoes: Target 
Bag: Gift 

What are the staple pieces in your wardrobe? 
Let me know in the comments!